»reality paranoia this is a dream a movie ,music or a thought«

Creation well enlightenment is the word but forget that for now .You see nothing is real everthing is an illusion feelings things you love and hold dear like your own mother or pet dont get offended or think im mad I just lost my mother anyway the simple fact is when someting is out of sight its out of mind so when you associate anything with soemthing thats your own programmed state of an illusion you could refer to the matrix you see if you had no thoughts about anything like been in a trance or budda state and disconnected your feelins from things the world would be a dream because we cant touch it yes we walk around in it but if you walking down the street and you smell A smell and cant recall what it is from programmed experience its not real so if you think you can think nothing then you would disconnect yourself from the world and go blind this is just a bit of my idea please get back andy.

I'm sorry to hear of your loss. But do not seek Buddha nature as anhilation or detachment... In the Lankavatara Sutra it is said--

"Some philosophers conceive Nirvana to be found where the mind-system no more operates owing to the cessation of the elements that make up personality and its world; or is found where there is utter indifference to the objective world and its impermanency.... These views severally advanced by the philosophers with their various reasonings are not in accord with logic nor are they acceptable to the wise. They all conceive Nirvana dualistically and in some causal connection; by these discriminations philosophers imagine Nirvana, but where there is no rising and no disappearing, how can there be discrimination? Each philosopher relying on his own textbook from which he draws his understanding, sins against the truth, because truth is not where he imagines it to be. The only result is that it sets his mind to wandering about and becoming more confused as Nirvana is not to be found by mental searching, and the more his mind becomes confused the more he confuses other people."

i search not for budda as a wise man siad once those who seek themselves seek others.